I’ve been working on this essay for awhile.

But before I make it public I will write a little about the most violent year of my life - 2025.  

I’ve been attacked multiple times and will spare details for now.

Prior to that and this year I’ve been without a sense of community and care - I had left a relationship and it was different from others in that all my previous relationships - children were involved and centered.  

My rough and tumble ways had me feeling down and got me into some desperate situations with desperate people - 

But I’ve been praying for a hello from a kid or a smile from a baby to be quite honest. 
As a sign of my energy being cleared... a pathway back something spiritual in me. 
In this earth of nurture.  

I’ve been going to Hare Krishna temple
and went one afternoon
and I was surrounded by babies
- I started crying.


I’ve been getting hellos from kids and familes on the street.

To me this is Holy.

So I’ll work on this preface a little more before I go into my article or report or wanderings of Holyland.

Its “closure”

Its violence.



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